sauntering-vaguely-downwards:

sauntering-vaguely-downwards:

sauntering-vaguely-downwards:

I think we can all agree that the best thing about the trailer was that Artemis actually looked dumb as hell in his little suit and gucci shades as any 12 year old dressed as a hitman should 

when i was in my early teens reading about a 12-15 y/o walking around in a suit and running a criminal empire I was so about that shit. as an Adult, now, I can recognize Butler probably thought Artemis was cosplaying a businessman and didn’t realize he was serious until it was too late to back out

Butler, in ch 1 of the first book, hunkered down in a heat shielded tent watching an oak tree through some binoculars: I don’t think this counts as larping anymore

arianagrandgay:

no offense but squidward saying “nobody cares about the fate of labor as long as they can get their instant gratification” is more woke than anything wendy’s twitter or any liberal has ever said

gay-son-of-a-pastor:

redwwood:

jeb bush 2020 launching himself at ted cruz on the senate floor: you killed my father* prepare to die!**

*George H.W Bush (1924-2018) was killed by the Zodiac Killer on November 30th, 2018

**just a funny quote from a really good movie called the princess bride please go check it out at your local library

***there wasn’t a third astrix but I just wanted you all to know that I appreciate when you laugh at my really fun jokes and that I really work really hard. love you, no hard feelings!

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neil-gaiman:

neil-gaiman:

I was reading a book (about interjections, oddly enough) yesterday which included the phrase “In these days of political correctness…” talking about no longer making jokes that denigrated people for their culture or for the colour of their skin. And I thought, “That’s not actually anything to do with ‘political correctness’. That’s just treating other people with respect.”

Which made me oddly happy. I started imagining a world in which we replaced the phrase “politically correct” wherever we could with “treating other people with respect”, and it made me smile. 

You should try it. It’s peculiarly enlightening.

I know what you’re thinking now. You’re thinking “Oh my god, that’s treating other people with respect gone mad!”

Happy Valentine’s Day.

It feels like it’s time to repost this.

porterdavis:

cutemantis:

sataniasuccubus:

cutemantis:

Men always say women put too much effort into their appearance and skin care but maybe its the men who dont put ENOUGH effort into their appearance ever think of THAT

men need to start using conditioner and stop buying axe products

Men who use conditioner have hair that’s so fun to play with……